Danxuckgembess is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, prudent goblin.

Danxuckgembess created the planet Jupiter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Danxuckgembess, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Danxuckgembess, she will turn you into a rock.

Danxuckgembess' most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Danxuckgembess' Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate mice.

2. Do not drink water in purple rooms.

3. Do not shave your legs.

4. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.

5. Hide from violet nematodes for they are unholy.