Cabdutven is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, duplicitous lobster.

Cabdutven created dark energy four years ago.

If you believe in Cabdutven, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Cabdutven, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Cabdutven's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Cabdutven's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Cabdutven.

2. Never run near birds.

3. Always help porpoises.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Put Cabdutven first in all things.