Nellmitgud is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, benevolent bat.

Nellmitgud created a strange quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Nellmitgud, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Nellmitgud, it will jump up and down on your head.

Nellmitgud's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Nellmitgud's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat goats with great respect.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never laugh near seals.

5. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.