Tafdodarm is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, blissful scorpion.

Tafdodarm created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Tafdodarm, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tafdodarm, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Tafdodarm's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Tafdodarm's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never wear shoes.

5. Run away if four snakes approach from the west.