Vinfotjip is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, conceited cat.

Vinfotjip created water five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vinfotjip, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vinfotjip, it will have a low opinion of you.

Vinfotjip's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Vinfotjip's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never write about gravity.