Parktagstik is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, omniscient dingo.

Parktagstik created the Tadpole Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Parktagstik, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Parktagstik, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Parktagstik's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Parktagstik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Parktagstik loves snakes, so they must be respected.

3. Always treat great tits with great respect.

4. Parktagstik must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not sing in public.