Ragsabfonkomfodortlak is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, thoughtless beaver.

Ragsabfonkomfodortlak created vertebrates seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ragsabfonkomfodortlak, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ragsabfonkomfodortlak, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Ragsabfonkomfodortlak's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Ragsabfonkomfodortlak's Holy Commandments

1. Never jump in holy places.

2. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

3. Run away from violet mice, for they are unholy.

4. Erect six tin sculptures of Ragsabfonkomfodortlak on top of important buildings.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.