Labgof is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, resourceful swallow.

Labgof created oxygen nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Labgof, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Labgof, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Labgof's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Labgof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Never wear fawn tights.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never skip in holy places.