Godgebgess is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, humorless newt.

Godgebgess created vertebrates six million years ago.

If you believe in Godgebgess, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Godgebgess, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Godgebgess' most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Godgebgess' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Turtles are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always obey Godgebgess' priests.

4. Never feed tomatoes to dolphins while wearing red dresses.

5. You must pray to Godgebgess four times a day.