Pasyessrip is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, selfish turtle.

Pasyessrip created the Tadpole Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pasyessrip, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Pasyessrip, she will turn you into a rat.

Pasyessrip's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Pasyessrip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not wear cyan clothing.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.