Fasartfag is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, idiotic newt.

Fasartfag created snails four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fasartfag, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fasartfag, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Fasartfag's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Fasartfag's Holy Commandments

1. Always help horses.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fasartfag.

4. Do not eat peanuts.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fasartfag.