Cadvabzak is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, dishonourable penguin.

Cadvabzak created parasitic wasps five million years ago.

If you believe in Cadvabzak, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cadvabzak, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Cadvabzak's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Cadvabzak's Holy Commandments

1. Moths are not to be trusted.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Goats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Retreat if three nematodes approach from the south.