Konyatarf is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, compassionate weasel.

Konyatarf created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Konyatarf, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Konyatarf, he will turn you into a snail.

Konyatarf's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Konyatarf's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if seven ants approach from the east.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Doves are not to be trusted.

4. Never wear scarves.

5. You must love Konyatarf.