Timpigfod is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, grumpy eagle.

Timpigfod created the Large Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Timpigfod, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Timpigfod, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Timpigfod's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Timpigfod's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry monkeys.

2. Never think ill of sick squirrels.

3. Never eat bananas.

4. Always look after injured voles.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.