Pangnarlbimfemton is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, all-powerful hippopotamus.

Pangnarlbimfemton created matter three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pangnarlbimfemton, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Pangnarlbimfemton, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Pangnarlbimfemton's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Pangnarlbimfemton's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry birds.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snakes.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.
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