Vig Dogmaddib is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful seal.

Vig Dogmaddib created water five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vig Dogmaddib, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Vig Dogmaddib, she will jump up and down on your head.

Vig Dogmaddib's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Vig Dogmaddib's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no sharks in a building before entering it.

2. Never jump in holy places.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vig Dogmaddib.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Pray towards the north.