Gatwipab is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, fast cat.

Gatwipab created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gatwipab, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gatwipab, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Gatwipab's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Gatwipab's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Gatwipab.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Gatwipab on top of all buildings.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never bounce in holy places.