Jonfosstik Cuddanhog is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, intelligent jellyfish.

Jonfosstik Cuddanhog created the planet Venus three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jonfosstik Cuddanhog, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Jonfosstik Cuddanhog, it will turn you into a slug.

Jonfosstik Cuddanhog's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Jonfosstik Cuddanhog's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine tortoises approach from the north.

2. Never eat gooseberries.

3. Do not dye your hair magenta.

4. Hide from green sharks for they are unholy.

5. You must pray to Jonfosstik Cuddanhog four times a day.