Quamgilgod Quatmonsig is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, confident deer.

Quamgilgod Quatmonsig created bats two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quamgilgod Quatmonsig, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Quamgilgod Quatmonsig, he will curse you with boils.

Quamgilgod Quatmonsig's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Quamgilgod Quatmonsig's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Quamgilgod Quatmonsig's priests.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Capybaras are not to be trusted.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not shave your legs.