Hotgomweg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, selfish mongoose.

Hotgomweg created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hotgomweg, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Hotgomweg, she will turn you into a plant.

Hotgomweg's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Hotgomweg's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Erect six iron sculptures of Hotgomweg on top of important buildings.