Hoggetxin is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, sapient skunk.

Hoggetxin created an atom three billion years ago.

If you believe in Hoggetxin, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hoggetxin, he will boil you in a big pot.

Hoggetxin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Hoggetxin's Holy Commandments

1. Hoggetxin loves dogs, so they must be respected.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Run away from purple hamsters, for they are unholy.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never feed carrots to sheep while wearing fawn stockings.