Disspagcepmetlan is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, stupid crane.

Disspagcepmetlan created the Small Magellanic Cloud two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Disspagcepmetlan, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Disspagcepmetlan, it will jump up and down on your head.

Disspagcepmetlan's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Disspagcepmetlan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Put Disspagcepmetlan first in all things.

4. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

5. Never wear corsets.