Witciss is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, idiotic horse.

Witciss created bats five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Witciss, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Witciss, he will throw large rocks at you.

Witciss' most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Witciss' Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine horses approach from the west.

2. Always make sure there are no manatees in a building before entering it.

3. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Witciss on top of important buildings.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.