Cenzakxin is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, unfair fox.

Cenzakxin created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cenzakxin, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cenzakxin, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Cenzakxin's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Cenzakxin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. You must pray to Cenzakxin eight times a day.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.