Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan is a god.

He takes the form of a small, omnipotent mouse.

Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan created an up quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sinbanrap Gamafbenzan.

2. Always help squirrels.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Hide if nine frogs approach from the north.