Kanfut is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, smart fish.

Kanfut created Africa three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kanfut, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Kanfut, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Kanfut's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Kanfut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Feed all hungry snakes.

4. Run away if three dolphins approach from the east.

5. Always look after injured moths.