Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, merciful jackal.

Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk created the Black Eye Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk, he will not care at all.

Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

2. Run away from red horses, for they are unholy.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk.

5. Dutshavcip Vinmipbonk must be the most important thing in your life.