Largnulsag is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, blissful dugong.

Largnulsag created Africa two billion years ago.

If you believe in Largnulsag, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Largnulsag, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Largnulsag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Largnulsag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Largnulsag.

3. Retreat if nine tortoises approach from the east.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not wear platinum on your body.