Arfpitkop is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, intelligent cat.

Arfpitkop created the Sunflower Galaxy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfpitkop, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Arfpitkop, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Arfpitkop's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Arfpitkop's Holy Commandments

1. Put Arfpitkop first in all things.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never mention swans.

5. Never wear violet kilts.