Sommabzak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, benevolent capybara.

Sommabzak created Africa nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sommabzak, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Sommabzak, she will remove you from existence.

Sommabzak's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Sommabzak's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Sommabzak.

2. Sommabzak must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Sommabzak on top of all buildings.

5. Erect six copper sculptures of Sommabzak on top of important buildings.