Vintimmat is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, kind clam.

Vintimmat created a top quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vintimmat, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Vintimmat, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Vintimmat's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Vintimmat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat tomatoes.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never eat peas.

4. Hide if three moths approach from the south.

5. Do not stand on grass.