Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, clever goat.

Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart created oxygen nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Fomnatkopomtpibgomsabyart loves seals, so they must be honoured.

3. Never go into violet rooms.

4. Never think ill of sick badgers.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.