Sagtitdoss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, resourceful penguin.

Sagtitdoss created the planet Mars five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sagtitdoss, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Sagtitdoss, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Sagtitdoss' most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Sagtitdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Run away from fawn aardvarks, for they are unholy.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Sagtitdoss.

4. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

5. Never talk about capybaras.