Narlfidlarg is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, smart parrot.

Narlfidlarg created dark matter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Narlfidlarg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Narlfidlarg, she will destroy your home planet.

Narlfidlarg's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Narlfidlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Never laugh near pigs.

3. Always wear cyan.

4. Feed all hungry aardvarks.

5. Never hurt otters.