Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, unfair rhinoceros.

Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk created gold six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Betcimyarbedtonkwitvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not wear purple clothing.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never paint your arms gray.