Wotmiftif is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, self-assured rhinoceros.

Wotmiftif created bats four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wotmiftif, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Wotmiftif, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Wotmiftif's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Wotmiftif's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.