Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, humorless fox.

Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik created the world five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Gupdibafrigxen Cipvonwik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Feed all hungry aardvarks.