Yikcendub is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, weak jaguar.

Yikcendub created a bottom quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Yikcendub, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Yikcendub, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Yikcendub's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Yikcendub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill monkeys.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

5. Never talk about planets.