Logpomtab is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, merciful goose.

Logpomtab created the Whirlpool Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Logpomtab, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Logpomtab, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Logpomtab's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Logpomtab's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not listen to music.