Lagvengilyar is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, unfair wyrm.

Lagvengilyar created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lagvengilyar, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Lagvengilyar, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Lagvengilyar's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Lagvengilyar's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat tomatoes.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Never talk about hamsters.