Lipbetzun is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, self-assured finch.

Lipbetzun created the planet Venus five million years ago.

If you believe in Lipbetzun, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Lipbetzun, he will ignore you.

Lipbetzun's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Lipbetzun's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not kill doves.

3. You must pray to Lipbetzun nine times a day.

4. Never paint your arms brown.

5. Do not wear silver on your body.