Tunjen is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, calm weasel.

Tunjen created Asia five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tunjen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tunjen, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Tunjen's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Tunjen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Do not skip in public.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.