Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, witty yak.

Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif created the Small Magellanic Cloud two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Bonkjarnfarcar Madlargtif's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry moths.

2. Never laugh in holy places.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.