Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unjust mole.

Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab created the Black Eye Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab, he will turn you into a dog.

Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never eat pineapples.

4. Always obey Flatflanlenzakgepjinpopflab's priests.

5. Do not eat carrots.