Vidlistdib Titfenjarn is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, dishonest turtle.

Vidlistdib Titfenjarn created gold nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Vidlistdib Titfenjarn, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Vidlistdib Titfenjarn, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Vidlistdib Titfenjarn's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Vidlistdib Titfenjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from violet pigs for they are unholy.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vidlistdib Titfenjarn.

3. You must never eat strawberries.

4. Do not drink water in white rooms.

5. Do not speak about bread.