Bopcarmab is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, dishonourable fox.

Bopcarmab created tapeworms four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bopcarmab, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bopcarmab, she will turn you into a rock.

Bopcarmab's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Bopcarmab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.

5. Never wear ear rings.