Logkimzenken is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, selfish rhinoceros.

Logkimzenken created carbon nine million years ago.

If you believe in Logkimzenken, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Logkimzenken, she will turn you into a tree.

Logkimzenken's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Logkimzenken's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not kill nematodes.

3. You must pray to Logkimzenken seven times a day.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not take Logkimzenken's name in vain.