Hamlagkamsadhappop is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, emotional squirrel.

Hamlagkamsadhappop created time and space eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hamlagkamsadhappop, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hamlagkamsadhappop, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Hamlagkamsadhappop's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Hamlagkamsadhappop's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never eat beans.

3. Hamlagkamsadhappop must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Hamlagkamsadhappop on top of all buildings.