Tithengup is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, bad-tempered monkey.

Tithengup created viruses five million years ago.

If you believe in Tithengup, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Tithengup, he will come to you in dreams.

Tithengup's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Tithengup's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never think about stars.

4. Feed all hungry badgers.

5. Respect your elders.