Sterbatvab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, unthoughtful narwhal.

Sterbatvab created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sterbatvab, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sterbatvab, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Sterbatvab's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Sterbatvab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never talk about turtles.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never think about amino acids.

5. Do not listen to music.